Wednesday, 11 May 2011

A mothers paranoia

I have been giving this some thought and I truly believe that with diabetes comes paranoia, they are best of friends. I have always considered myself fairly laid back with regard to Samuels diabetes. I have always thought that there is no point stressing and worrying about things that you can't control or change. Granted, I have times when I don't listen to myself, but hey I am only human.
When our first child was born we always had the underlying worry that she would develop diabetes. My husband has type 1, and it was, and still is a constant worry that he will 'give it' to the children. This worry eased and we went on to have three more children.
However, when Samuel was diagnosed the guilt returned ten fold, more so for my husband. I remember thinking that if any of the children were going to develop it it would have been my first. I had bottle fed her, and breast fed all the others, and breast feeding reduces the changes of developing diabetes......... right?
Anyhow, Samuel has now been diabetic for two years and I find myself watching the girls more closely. Looking for any sign, any hint that diabetes is going to force itself on another of my children. My oldest has taken part in the D-GAP study, this looks at four antibodies of 'unaffected siblings of a diabetic child diagnosed under the age of 16.' We know that she has 2 or more of the 4 antibodies, this means that she has a 1 in 5 (20%) chance of developing type 1 within the next 5 years. My youngest has recently had chicken pox. Evidence has shown that viruses, in some people, can cause the pancreas to shut down and they develop type 1 diabetes. Chicken pox is viral and Samuel had had bad case of flu three months before he was diagnosed.
Every time one of the girls goes to the toilet more times than they did the day before, or has had more to drink, or looks tired the first thing that springs to mind is.... is it a sign? Should I be worried?
I KNOW that the likelihood of the girls developing type 1 is slightly higher as they have a parent and a sibling affected, but it is not that high.
I KNOW that there is actually nothingbi can do to prevent them from developing it.
I KNOW that I can't spend the rest of my life watching and symptom spotting.

I don't want to turn into a paranoid mother reading too much into everything that they do. The chances are that they are drinking more because it is a hot day and they are thirsty. Although it surely can't hurt to do random testing........say, once a month..... can it?